There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
