just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
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