Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
