I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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