Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
