remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
