Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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