that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
