He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Randomize
