My hair reeks of homosexuality.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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