we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
