gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
