my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
dude. I can hear the air.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
