she was so not down for the gang bang
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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