her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
