I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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