Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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