That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
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