So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
