Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
