Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize