Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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