that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
