It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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