her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize