ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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