Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
