weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
