Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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