She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I need water and some morals
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
