cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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