If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Fuck me I smell like cheese
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
