There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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