I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
