things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Randomize
