Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
