found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
