your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
