problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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