Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
