My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize
