I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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