i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
