I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
whose ass print is on the piano?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
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