I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize