Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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