What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
