Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
