Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
