Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
